Sunday, February 5, 2006

through her thoughts.


Close her eyes...

There are few things in life that seem to faze her. Not many secrets surprise her and not many things that people say or do cause a dint in her exterior. But these are things that don't effect her, have really nothing to do with her and are not part of her private life. So when it effects her in any way,  she doesn't know how to deal with it. But she learns, slowly,  the best way to get over it.

Turn and walk away...

She doesn't need someone to explain the situation to her, she knows exactly what it is. There's no point reasoning because there is no balance in the whole thing. All she can do, all she can think of, to help everyone in the situation is to suck it in, pretend that it didn't matter to her. Otherwise it causes unnecessary disagreements. So she turns and walks away, doesn't turn back to see how it all played out. It doesn't matter to her.

Through her thoughts...

So she sits and pretends that it doesn't affect her the way its suppose to. Why bother? Why even try explaining that it causes her heart to crush? It doesn't do any good because no one can see the situation the way she sees it. No one knows the frustration, the anger and the pain she pushes deeper inside of her. Even if they new would they even understand. She doubts it... so it doesn't matter to her...

If it is the way you are...

How can anything change if that's how you are? Why bother changing you if that's who she thought you were? It's all too complicated, she hasn't even really sorted it out in her head. All she knows is that she feels like its wrong, like its too far, too much for her to handle. If that's how you are when she's around... what's it really like when she's not around? Despite all the reassurances you may give her... the thought still haunts her...

Write it down and let it drift away...


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